Genocide by Suicide
The Deception of Self-Murder
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry…I didn’t mean to do it….”
FOREWORD: There are more suicides by American Indian Youth per capita then among any other ethnic group in America. This article I wrote being inspired by God to do so was for the purpose of both exposing the “spiritual understandings” connected to suicide as well as offering a “spiritual of God” solution.
During a two week period in the month of July and August 08, 2010, there were 4 suicides in the community of Oglala on the Pine Ridge Indian Reservation. Overall…suicides are on a RISE throughout the Reservation.
This was a email received (12/9/09) concerning the week of (12/2-12/9) from a member of the Rosebud Sioux Tribe. A State of Emergency was declared on the Rosebud Sioux Tribe reservation in 3/07 because of the increase in suicides and attempted suicides. There were 61 attempts from Jan 1-07 to March 12-07
“Hey we had another suicide you probably heard about last week, also 4 attempted this past weekend, the youngest being 14 year old male, who tried to hang himself but was caught, one cut their wrist, one overdosed, the last just happened last night, didn’t get the info on how they tried. I now am hearing that the kids today are thinking “It’s the in thing to do”…on some of their bebo pages they brag about…if their going to go out, “their going to go out to suicide, end their own chit”. I’m in total disbelief right now, this is a emergency situation. I think what’s needed to be done to try to combat the situation is change their perception of thinking, shove it down their throats, Suicide is evil, something is messed up here. – Anthony Bordeaux Jr. is a Sicangu Lakota and member of the Rosebud Sioux Tribe.
Journey To The Spirit World By Suicide
Buddy Red Bow, a traditional Oglala Lakota singer wrote a song entitled “Journey to the Spirit World”, a song about “getting ready” to pass over into the “Spirit World” and into a life of joy and not like the one here. “The Ghost Dance” was and is a prayer expressing the visionary hope and promise of a better life before and after death because the “Red Messiah” who’s name is “Wasu” (Jesus among the Lakota) will return to deliver His people from all that is not of Him in this life. He will raise from the dead those of our relatives that have passed into the Spirit World and we all shall be together again. Traditional Lakota and most other Native American beliefs say our spirit enters into the Spirit World upon the death of our body. Once there, it is our hope and the promise of the Messiah, even Jesus Christ, to be in His presence where we will experience the healing of our hearts, be with our loved ones and relations, and where all suffering and pain is no more forever.
There are many reasons for the death of the body. Some natural such as old age with the body simply wearing out like an old moccasin. Other things contribute to the death of our body such as cancer, diabetes, and heart disease and in Indian Country, they are primary killers. Then there are the drug and alcohol death destroying affects on our body, on our brain, heart, liver, and kidneys.
These same drugs and alcohol also allow for “spirit-heart changers” (evil spirits or demons) to overthrow our souls. These evil spirits inspire first thoughts and then the behaviors that hurt and kill as evidenced in rape, abuse, fights, beatings, shootings, stabbings, child molestations, and alcohol connected car wrecks as seen throughout “Indian Country”. These dark spirits work both in us and outside of us through others. They contribute to the destruction of marriages, families, young and old alike. Alcohol is the preferred beverage of the devil and his angels (demons/evil spirits) and is his “death drink” that is used by him to inspire evil Non-Lakota/Non Native American behaviors found among us. Drugs are also used, both illegal and “legal”.
Then there is the death that is different from all others. It is death by self-murder which we call Suicide. Suicide is when we make a choice to “kill ourselves”. We do this because we believe that we will be delivered from all that troubles us here in this life. We are “evil spirit/demon led” to believe this lie. Otherwise we would not attempt to kill ourselves. Native American spirituality does not allow for, inspire, or give examples of suicide as being the will of Tunkasila the Creator…our God.
It is important to understand that suicide is ONLY the killing of ones body. The spirit inside of the body never dies. Only the body dies when we kill ourselves. When the body dies, the spirit continues to live as it immediately leaves the body and enters into the “Spirit World”. After your spirit leaves your body, you find yourself awake then even as you are now in reading these words.
All the feelings, thoughts, and experiences that lead to suicide first begin with a “spiritual thought” that is next acted out through our flesh in the act of killing ourselves. Before we “kill our body”, we are FIRST “spiritually attacked” in our heart and mind by the evil spirits who give us the “excuse or reasons” to kill ourselves. The ONLY goal of “evil spirits/demons” is to “convince us” that there is no other choice in life but to kill ourselves and that suicide is our only escape from the pain we are suffering here. It should be noted, that the very same demons/spirits that put the reasons in our mind to “kill ourselves” also are responsible for helping create the real life experiences which hurt us.
One of the most used “excuse or reason” put into our heart and mind to murder ourselves is when our heart is betrayed by the one we love, who we find with another. Boyfriend, girlfriend, husband or wife, THIS betrayal of our heart has been said to be the same as death itself for THIS pain is not measurable in words. It is then we begin to experience the thoughts of suicide and we “feel like dying” and this is because the “demons/evil spirits” KNOW that we are now at our weakest. It is also then THEN that the “demons/evil spirits” put the thought into our mind that “killing ourselves” is THE ANSWER for us to escape this pain and to “hurt those that hurt us” because they “broke our heart” when they betrayed us.
Other times of when we are weak spiritually is when we lose a loved one to an untimely death where they die from cancer, an accident, or when a close relative, loved one, boyfriend or close friend, kill themselves. All of these experiences cause spiritual pain to our heart and mind. If we do not understand the promise of the Jesus Christ that we shall be reunited together in the spirit world when we pass over, we find ourselves in our weakest state of mind and then are more easily influenced by the “demonic spirits” who put thoughts in our mind for us to kill ourselves.
How cunning are these evil spirits? Think about this. Not only do they try to get you/us to kill ourselves but they also were the spiritual source of the lusts, thoughts, and feelings and actions on the part of those that chose to betray our love and hurt us! It is the same even when we lose a loved one. They try to use any loss to tempt us with the thought that maybe we now should kill ourselves.
There are other reasons “put into our hearts and minds” to kill ourselves as found in the “memories” of parents, husband or wife, boyfriend or girlfriend never being sober, who drink themselves into total unawareness of us. Children especially suffer because it is they who need most the love and affection of their parents but receive none. Some suffer from beatings and sexual abuse and have nowhere to go or no one to turn to or trust. Young children kill themselves to escape the “hell of home”.
The daily experiences on the majority of reservations are a constant reminder of the past and present oppression. No jobs, houses that are falling apart with no way to fix them, no money for food and bills, to buy things needed for children and babies and the list goes on leaving us with no hope for things to get better. It is this feeling of hopelessness that also pulls us into the dark pit of despair. It is then we are tempted to believe the LIE given to us by evil spirits that death by suicide will deliver us from our pain and suffering and be our “Savior”
The harsh, oppressive, and inhuman realities of reservation life are NOT an accident. They are made by those who followed the “intelligence” of the same evil spirit who is trying to convince us to kill our self. That spirit is called the “devil”. Think about this. What is the solution he offers you for things to change? Say “get drunk or high” or WORSE , “kill yourself” while he IS the one that created the very “reservation reasons” which he then uses to convince you to destroy yourself!
In the beginning of Native American history, it was the Creator (called Tunkasila among the Lakota) who taught us our spirituality. It was not learned from the White man, the “Catholic-Christians”, the Pope, Mormons, or any other European source. Our spirituality and teachings do not teach us to hurt, betray, humiliate, defile, disrespect, murder, rape, abuse, or desecrate another soul. The Creator said in all our relationships we should do good to one another and love one another in all areas of our life. We are to be faithful to our wives and husbands. We are to be compassionate, generous, and giving, We are to make sure that there are no poor or hungry among us, no homeless, our elders, women and children are to be loved, respected, and taken care of. That is the will of the Creator Tunkasila and when we follow His spirit in being that way, we are then living on the Red Road and are who we were created to be.
To not live this way is to live and experience the spiritual and physical “death” of the Black Road and is not the way of God. When a soul “listens to and follows the evil spirits of the Black Road, we begin to do things that are hurtful to others and ourselves. See how smart the devil is? Of course, while he is doing this, he whispers in our ears “there is no devil…I am no devil”.
A man wrote about an experience he had in the Spirit World. He was shown how evil spirits enter our mind and influence us. While in a hospital and very sick, he suddenly “died” on the operating table and was “dead” for 8 minutes. During this time, he began to experience his spirit leaving his body. The next thing he realized and understood was that he was in the presence and company of one who identified himself as Jesus Christ. It was during this experience with Jesus that he witnessed two most important scenes.
The first one was when he was taken to to a scene where he saw a young man sitting down next to his father and saying “Pops Pops…I am sorry … please tell mom I am sorry…” begging his father to tell his mother over and over again. The problem was, his father could not hear him cry out in this pain and agony. Another scene he saw a young girl crying out to her boyfriend…to forgive her and that she was sorry for what she had done. Again, she could not be heard.
What Jesus revealed was this. He told the man who was with him that “These are those that committed suicide and this was the consequence of their act”!! How powerful and yet sad. They did not know that when they killed themselves that this was what they would be experiencing in the “Spirit World” and having to confront. There is more about this understanding in this writing down below.
The next experience Jesus showed this man was when he was taken into a bar and allowed to witness a scene where he saw many men who were heavily drinking. He also noticed that their were other “spirit bodies” there who were trying to drink the same drink but they were unable. These “spirits without bodies” were trying to grab a drink of alcohol. Each time they tried to grab a drink, their hand passed through the glass. The man then realized the “others” trying to drink were “spirits” of those who had died and were in the Spirit World in this same “need to drink” but could not. In this condition. In the spirit world, they found themselves still craving and wanting to drink but without a “body of flesh”, they could not. This was their torment…to want to drink but to never ever experience again and this was their “eternal condition” in the Spirit World. A word for this is called “hell”.
Then Jesus was directed this man to observe a man who passed out from drinking heavily and fell on the floor. All of a sudden, he was shocked to see this man’s forehead open up a “spiritual hole” in the front of his forehead. All of a sudden, one of the “spirits” that had died and had no body, the one that was trying to drink his drink, IMMEDIATELY entered into him through that opening in his forehead like a flash of lightening.
This experience shows how alcohol and drugs are the “door openers” for demons/evil spirits to enter our hearts and minds. Once “inside of us”, they can then more easily influence our thoughts, feelings, and then our actions. It is when one drinks alcohol and or is doing drugs, that anger, rage, hate, beatings, abuse, rapes, killings etc, take place because they are “evil spirit” inspired. Sometimes one remembers what they do when under the influence of EVIL SPIRITS other times no.
It needs to be understood that the most EVIL of acts we commit are inspired by those “spirits” caste out of Heaven with Lucifer who is Satan the Devil. They are here on earth without bodies. They work is to change our hearts and thinking so that we do the most evil things to one another and ourselves. They are the spirits that convince us to kill ourselves!
So we now we see how these spirits get us to KILL OURSELVES through use of alcohol and drugs. Once they have place in our hearts and minds, they are then able to become one with our thinking and are then more easily able to convince us that “their thoughts” are OURS. They work to get us to believe the LIES they put in our mind that there is only ONE WAY to stop all of our pain, to end the memories of suffering. Finally, they are able to overcome our will power and thinking so that then we cannot tell their thinking from ours. They are so good at what they do, that we are now thinking their thoughts to the point we do not know this. This is how the devil uses alcohol and drugs with their goal being to convince us to KILL OURSELVES. When we believe their lie because they are now in control of our spirit and body…all of our thoughts and feelings and we no longer are aware of this.
This is why alcohol is the preferred beverage of Satan. Alcohol and drugs are more times then not, directly connected to “self-murder”. Remember, that it was the European who first offered alcohol and continues to do so now. Therefore, understand who the Oppressor represents in both this life and eternity. Say Satan who has his regional headquarters in White Clay!
The following story is a powerful, sad, and painful one. During a traditional Lakota wiping of tears ceremony during a sweat, Elder’s Beatrice Whiting, member of the Crow Creek Sioux Tribe and her husband Ed, member of the Rosebud Sioux Tribe, had a revealing and powerful experience “FROM the spirit world”. It came in the form of a young Lakota woman who committed suicide at the age of 17.
While they were singing and praying during their sweat, a light began to appear before them. As it increased in size, they began to see the face of this young woman they new. Her name was Darliss Brown, a member of the Crow Creek Sioux Tribe. Darliss was the daughter of Darla Rabbit and was a past student of Beatrice. Darliss had committed suicide two weeks before. Why? Because her heart was betrayed when she found her boyfriend with another girl. Darliss was also carrying “their” child.
The spirit of Darliss was weeping and cried out saying “I am sorry, I am sorry, I didn’t mean to do it”. Beatrice saw her suffering and saw that Darliss NOW realized the consequences of her self-murder. In the spirit world, Jesus allowed Darliss to experience and feel in her heart and mind every single emotion of pain and sorrow of those that loved her as if it was her own. As a result, she suffered “with them” because of what she did. She wept as they wept and mourned as they mourned over her death when they found out, at the wake, the funeral, and in the private places of weeping and wailing where no one saw them except her!
Darliss saw the hurt she caused her mother, nephews, nieces, aunts, uncles, friends and relatives. This was the consequence of her self-murder. No escape, no joy, no deliverance from THIS pain and suffering. This was the consequence of her being “deceived” to kill herself. She was so sorry she HURT THEM THAT MUCH and had she known, she would never have killed herself.
One has to ask when you are being given thoughts by demons/evil spirits to kill yourself, do YOU want to hurt those who love you THAT MUCH? Darliss had been deceived into killing herself and was sorry but ONLY after her spirit left her body and entered into the spirit world. There her awareness was immediate and it was there that Jesus allowed her to understand that suicide was “demon/evil spirit inspired/alcohol/drug connected” and that she believed the lie of the devil and his evil spirits that they put into her mind. We now see how alcohol was the door opener for these evil spirits to enter into her body, heart, and mind…even her soul.
On November 25th of 0/7, four years after Darliss killed herself, Jesus allowed her mother to receive a visit from her daughter. Darliss came to her mother from the “spirit world” and into “time”. Darla was in her bedroom lying on her bed. She was holding a photo of Darliss and still grieving and weeping for her and still feeling the pain of missing her in her heart. All of a sudden, she felt a cool breeze in the room. At that moment, Darliss appeared before her in spirit and spoke to her in comforting words, “Mom, it’s all right, it’s all right”. Darla felt the love of her daughter for her as she spoke to her and that she was still sorrowful for what she had done as she was still grieving over the pain she had caused her mother and others, four years later.
Few who commit suicide are allowed by Jesus to come back from the “spirit world” to explain or share anything. They only see and witness the suffering of those they hurt. It is like the “two way mirror” in a police movie where you see but are not seen by those on the other side. You weep and wail and cry out for forgiveness and try to explain to them your mistake to all those you loved and who loved you, but it is no use because you can neither be seen or heard. You realize once you are in the “spirit world” that you were deceived by the devil and his evil spirits into believing the LIE that committing suicide was the “right thing or cool thing do” or that all your “troubles” would be over. This was a lie because now you suffer the torment and pain in realizing your act of self-murder cannot be undone. This is and will be your torment…or “hell”. Is there an end to this suffering? YES and there is forgiveness but only when Jesus determines you have learned your lesson. Then there is a healing. The question for everyone to ask is, do we want to kill ourselves to experience this?
Cherokee Walking Eagle Kills In Water is a Sicangu Lakota and member of the of the Rosebud Sioux Tribe. She lost her daughter Crystal to suicide. Crystal was a mother of six children. She also was drinking alcohol when she killed herself. She likewise was deceived by “evil spirits” into believing the lie that she could escape the pain that was in her life by committing suicide. Cherokee also had a “spirit world” experience with her daughter Crystal that helped her in her grieving. Three weeks after her daughter’s funeral, she had a “real life vision where Crystal appeared to her and started gently rubbing her head. She could feel her touch on her head. Crystal asked her mother “Are you alright”? Cherokee said “Yes, I am alright”. She felt Crystals concern for her as well as her sorrow over what she did. Cherokee wept during this visit from her daughter and was thankful that Jesus allowed Crystal to come to her as this helped her heal. When she awoke from the dream, Crystal had gone back to the “spirit world”.
Evil spirits will destroy our soul directly or through others using alcohol and drugs which are the tools of the Devil. He is then able to trick us (as the “trickster from hell) into believing the lie of suicide. The truth is suicide only releases our spirit into the spirit world when our body dies and when we arrive there in spirit, which is instantly, we then begin to suffer the consequences of this deception with no place to hide from the witnessing of the pain we cause those that loved us.
So what is the answer and alternative to suicide? It is the restoring of our love for one another as inspired by and demonstrated by Jesus Christ when He once walked among Native Peoples on this land. Crazy Horse was that example, Sitting Bull also was. The Spirit of the Creator manifested in the flesh through Jesus, must be restored in our hearts again. When that happens, no longer will we do or say anything to hurt another and thus we will no longer be used by the devil to be the source of death and destruction of other souls or our own. This also means we no longer use alcohol or do drugs. Until we cease this evil, we will continue suffering as a people individually and as a Nation.
The Black Rap Culture is also a tool of of the devil and his evil spirits. They are working hard to place in the hearts of young Native youth the thoughts, feelings, and actions that are demeaning to young Native men and women, Elders etc. This evil spirit of the THIS BLACK ROAD inspires violence, hate, vengeance, abuse of women, inspires murders and reduces Native sexuality to something disrespectful where women are dishonored, abused, raped, beaten etc. A Native females is not a “bitch” or “ho”. She is to be treated with dignity and respect. That is being truly Native. The opposite is the way of the devil. Native men have no excuse to be or do the same and in the spirit world, if they do not stop this behavior while alive, they will suffer the eternal consequences…say hell and deservingly so. In fact, Native men who treat Native women and children this way, will be with those blacks and whites who have done the same to their women as well as Native women.
What does all this mean in “real time’? It means one ceases to do in their life all that you know hurts and harms another including oneself. You do what you must to quit drinking, doing drugs, gambling. You seek out help, go to ceremonies, and pray to your Heavenly Father in the name of Jesus Christ to be given the power to change. It means you go to those you have hurt and tell them you are sorry and ask for their forgiveness and that you forgive those that hurt you. It means to become once again the faithful husband and wife, the mother or father that has been missed and is needed by your children, the relative and friend that was once there and needs to return. It means you forgive yourself even as Jesus has forgiven you. It means you begin to love yourself because you loved by Jesus and that His example of love is the example you were created to also be in your life for that is truly being Native.
It means that while you are here alive in your flesh before you journey to the spirit world, that you make this change while you still can so that you can undo the wrong which you have done to others. It means you no longer allow yourself to be deceived and directed by the evil spirits and be used by them in the destroying of your own people, your women and children, and yourself. Because when that happens, it is to late to love those that are lost even as it is to late to return from the spirit world when you kill yourself because of what others have done to you. It means turning to your Heavenly Father and praying for the strength to do what you must, for Him to heal you of all the pain and suffering you have caused or experienced in your life, because it cannot be done without His power which is His love for you.
This is the way to heal the broken hoop, to break the cycle of oppression and hate experienced and learned from Satan. God is waiting for us to turn to Him and ask for the strength to change in our hearts. He promises to heal us of our pain. That is what the Sun Dance is really about, as shown by the ultimate sacrifice of THE First Sun Dancer, even Jesus, the ultimate gift of healing and love. He is asking us this day to decide which road to take, the Red Road of blessing and healing and which restores our love for Him and one for another or the “Black Road” so many find ourselves on now, the one of evil inspired by the devil himself, the one of cursing, death, and hell, the one destroying us individually and collectively
The choice is laid before us to have restored that which was lost at Wounded Knee on December 28, 1890 in the vision, purpose, and prayer of the Ghost Dance. It is said in our prophecies given to us by Jesus that the Wasichu (White man) and Oppressor will never change for our good and that is the reason why Turtle Island will be “cleansed” by Him in the judgments soon to come upon this land.
This is why we must pray together to Tunkasila…even Almighty God, in the name of the One who represents all that is Holy, Jesus Christ, to deliver us from those evil spirits represented in the past and present so that the influences and affects of the devil are no more found in our hearts. When this happens, we once again can be called the people of the Almighty God and Jesus Christ and experience the answer of the Ghost Dance in having restored unto us the blessings we once experienced when He was in our midst on this land as His People.
When this happens, we will again be his Holy people, a people of one heart, one mind, dwelling in righteousness with no poor among us. It is because of His Sun Dance that death and hell IS overcome and our bodies and spirits healed and restored one to another. It is because of Jesus Christ that we will experience His promise of all of us being united together not only in the Spirit World but also on this earth!
Richard Boyden is available to speak at schools, community centers, church’s and (or elsewhere). He is a former instructor at Haskell Indian Nations University and taught “Investigative Journalism-Introduction to Radio Broadcasting”, former Marine and combat veteran. He is as an “attempted suicide survivor” who knows from personal experience what the spiritual realities and consequences of suicide are.
He can be reached at 605-939-1703 day or night or email at firstname.lastname@example.org
He has documented information on the suicide connection to anti-depressants on the OMS Web site at www.operationmorningstar.org